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I did it again!

“Can I ask you a question?” asked this girl.

“Yeah, that’ll be fun!” I replied back.

“You know that blog, which you wrote about your crush. Who was it?” The sharpness of the question shot me down. If it wasn’t for this girl, I would have said the name without hesitation.

Crushes or Infatuations are common for boys unless for some nerds. My thought of being a nerd was proven wrong when I got a higher rank in Engineering entrance. 36087 is a great number, but it was more of a statement that I was no less a common boy. I had few crushes in college. A couple of which I still ponder on. It did not happen at the very same time. That’d seem inappropriate. One in first year and the other distributed around the last 2 years.

By the end of my first year at college, I knew I had something going on with a girl. But the fact that there were too many bees buzzing around her head, made it a short-lived one. It was Christmas which incited the feeling and it took another Christ to pave way for my second adventure. An year passed by without another stop and somehow it happened again. There was a pall of uncertainty which always hung over my second experience. I didn’t know when, how or where it happened. But, it was special and so was she. Some say, “to have a crush on someone is a sign of growing up”. Rightly so, because I outgrew my wits but never my inhibitions. And even before I realised, college was over.

Because it lasted for a while, I decided to write a blog. I gave it the title “My crush was never in a relationship”. I always hoped her to be in a relationship, as I lacked the courage to express myself in person. But this question still breathed down by my neck “Who are you referring to?”. The answer was conspicuous by its absence.

But, when she came back with the same question 2 years later, I was overwhelmed to find out that she had read it. Afterall, very few people used Google Plus even during it’s prime. I soon deleted the blog, fearing she would seek an answer. Standing face to face with my fears, I took the easiest choice.

“So tell me, do not try to dodge.” She demanded.

“It was Girl-1, first year. That was my first crush”. I told her the lie but there was some truth. I refrained from saying, “there was another one and it was you”. Nevertheless, nobody wants to be second to none.

I lied to my crush about my crush. I did it again! I evaded the truth. I am getting better at lying day by day. From master procrastinator to master liar.😇

Originally published at https://sonnynefarious.blogspot.com on April 29, 2020.